It is 12:25 a.m. and I am currently window (screen) shopping on Cartier right now.
And zero fucks are being given.
I spent another late night in the t.v. room studying a few weeks ago talking to the girl who sent Mr. Big running (a feat on its own) from Grande on her birthday.
We had gone out to dinner together the week before and after a couple appetizers began talking about how she and her fiancé (weird) met. They’d been dating five years now.
She said they met when she was a freshman in college and he was much older.
He tricked her into dating him… actually, he just declared they were dating. No questions asked, no considerations taken.
She said things were rocky in the beginning. She was always resisting. Her eyes always strayed; she was a wanderer. She fought every step along their relationship- almost like a gnat caught in a web.
And then one day, I just grew up. I just woke up one morning and decided to stop. One day, Juliana, you’ll find someone who would do anything for you. And you will love it. And you will love them.
It took her almost a year to tire of her rebellion.
I think I’m approaching my retirement soon.
I talked to my best freckled friend’s mom about it.
…she told me to see a therapist.
…I told her I already had.
But in all seriousness, the war I’m waging against myself is winding to a close. I’m tired, and frankly, sick of it. I’m not sure why I was running… well I mean, sort of… but I think I’m done with it now.
Funny how it took so long for this revelation to occur. Everything happens in due time.
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